Through the Fog

Tag: unresolved feelings

  • I Still Think About You

    I still think about you.

    More than I should.

    Less than I used to.

    I guess that’s progress.

    You show up

    in stupid places—

    songs I didn’t choose,

    roads I’ve driven

    a hundred times,

    the middle of conversations

    that have absolutely

    nothing to do with you.

    And suddenly

    there you are.

    Not really.

    Just the version of you

    my memory refuses

    to throw away.

    Sometimes I wonder

    if you think about me too.

    If my name ever crosses

    your mind unexpectedly.

    If you ever reach

    for your phone

    before remembering

    we don’t do that anymore.

    I hate wondering.

    Because wondering

    is just hope

    wearing clothes

    it thinks I won’t recognize.

    And I recognize it.

    Every fucking time.

    The truth is,

    I don’t even know

    what I want from you anymore.

    I don’t know

    if I’d come back.

    I don’t know

    if I’d answer.

    I don’t know

    if hearing your voice

    would heal something

    or tear open everything

    I’ve worked so hard

    to close.

    I only know

    that I still think about you.

    And maybe that’s allowed.

    Maybe moving on

    doesn’t mean forgetting.

    Maybe someone can matter

    without belonging

    in your life anymore.

    Maybe I can miss you

    without reaching for you.

    Love what happened

    without asking

    for it to happen again.

    Remember you

    without turning the memory

    into an invitation.

    So yes—

    I still think about you.

    Sometimes softly.

    Sometimes angrily.

    Sometimes with an ache

    I can’t quite explain.

    But I don’t mistake

    thinking about you

    for needing you anymore.

    And maybe that’s

    how I know

    I’m finally letting go—

    you still cross my mind,

    but you don’t get

    to take me with you.

  • Fuck You

    Fuck you—

    for the silence,

    for the half-truths,

    for making me feel crazy

    for noticing

    what was right in front of me.

    Fuck you

    for acting distant

    while still keeping me close enough

    to hope.

    For every mixed signal

    you dressed up like confusion

    when really

    you just didn’t want

    to let go

    or fully stay.

    And maybe

    that’s what hurts most—

    not that you lied,

    not even that you left—

    but that you let me

    keep believing

    there was something here

    worth fighting for

    while you were already

    halfway gone.

    I replay it sometimes—

    all the moments

    I should’ve walked away,

    all the times

    my gut knew better

    but my heart

    kept overruling it.

    So yeah—

    fuck you.

    Not because I still want you.

    Not because I need revenge.

    But because I deserved honesty,

    and you gave me confusion

    instead.

    And now I’m stuck

    untangling the damage

    from something

    you couldn’t even admit

    was breaking.