Through the Fog

Tag: setting boundaries

  • Bad Attitude

    You call it a bad attitude

    because confidence

    looks rude

    when it doesn’t ask permission.

    Because I stopped smiling

    through things

    that hurt me.

    Because I learned

    how to say no

    without decorating it

    for your comfort.

    You liked me better

    when I was easier—

    when I folded myself smaller,

    when I confused silence

    for peace.

    Back when I apologized

    for taking up space,

    for having needs,

    for noticing disrespect

    and pretending I didn’t.

    Now I speak plainly.

    Now I leave

    when something feels wrong.

    Now I don’t explain myself

    to people committed

    to misunderstanding me.

    And somehow

    that became attitude.

    Funny how boundaries

    sound hostile

    to those who benefited

    from your lack of them.

    Funny how self-respect

    gets renamed

    when it no longer serves

    someone else.

    So call it what you want.

    Bad attitude.

    Too much.

    Difficult.

    Cold.

    I know what it is.

    It’s the posture

    of someone

    who got tired

    of being handled carelessly.

  • You Say I’m a Bitch

    You say I’m a bitch

    like it’s supposed to land heavy,

    like it should fold me in half

    or make me smaller

    for your comfort.

    Like I haven’t heard it before—

    from people who needed me quiet,

    easier,

    less likely to say

    no.

    You say it

    when I don’t bend,

    when I don’t soften my truth

    to fit your version of me.

    When I choose myself

    without asking

    if it makes you uncomfortable.

    And maybe that’s the problem.

    I stopped apologizing

    for having edges.

    Stopped explaining

    why I deserve space

    in a room I already stand in.

    You call it attitude.

    I call it awareness.

    You call it cold.

    I call it boundaries

    I learned the hard way.

    Because the same voice

    that calls me a bitch

    would’ve called me weak

    if I stayed quiet,

    grateful

    for less than I deserved.

    So say it again—

    if that’s the only language

    you know.

    But understand this:

    I didn’t become this way

    to hurt you.

    I became this way

    so I wouldn’t keep

    hurting myself.